If we were having chai together, I would marvel at the thought that we are already almost halfway through June. I notice in warm weather, with an iced cup of chai, that the tea has a totally different flavor, and is stronger. Perhaps heating the soy milk or the concentrate alters its taste? Or it is just a change to my own outlook on the mornings, when it is already light outside, that the flavor is more intense? It does make me ponder how a slight difference in approach can be so noticeable.
Over chai, I would tell you that I am changing my running route. A slight change, but an important one. Typically I run the same loop, all fall and winter, up through a certain part of town and then back. It feels like a circle, returning back to the start. I’ve noticed that something about leaving home and having the main goal of returning home has warn out its luster. Thus, a route change is in order. I have decided that I am going to start running toward something, to feel successful in reaching that point, and then find relief in turning around and coming home. I’ll have to see if that small change in approach is noticeable in my speed, intention, and satisfaction.
If we were having chai together, I would brag, proudly, at how great my friends are. Those who are considering becoming doulas and impacting birth work in that awesome path. Others who have moments of pure bravery and speak out, even when they are most unsure. And friends who are taking their first steps into midwifery after graduation, despite pure uncertainty of what different jobs may look like. Yes, friends, YES. I am applauding you and I hope you hear it and feel the air change around you when I do. What great things are your friends up to lately? Aren’t friends the greatest? Make sure you tell them so!
I would probably burst with need to tell you my distaste for the words “physician extender,” “mid level provider,” or “non-physician clinician.” I am a midwife, and my role has everything to do with my patients and how I work on a team of providers and believe in our roles in being experts in our own fields and complementing each other. The naming of my profession is intentional. Harumph, and thank you. [insert ceremonious large gulp of chai after point well-made]
You might note a tone of stress in my voice, because my to-do list has become a do-absolutely-right-now-because-it’s-already-late list. Trying to always catch up makes crossing things off less satisfying. And having little time to do something just because I want to makes it feel less important compared to other things. [insert sigh and defeated sip of chai]
If we were having chai together, I would ask about you. How do you re-set in moments of defeat? How do you celebrate moments of bravery, even if they feel less than successful when they were all said and done? What small changes are you making that have already led to big differences?
As our conversation pauses, I would hum this song, which has been on my playlist lately. Worth humming in moments of uncertainty or recovering from defeat.
I hope in June you find wild moments, in which you feel at your greatest. Allow yourself to be proud of your achievements, to learn from moments of faltering, and to grow along with the summer growth around you. And be brave, be your bravest, even when you are most unsure of it.